Take These Memories
by The Apocalypse Lock
Summary: A backstory to Yazoo's painful past. Takes place during the events of Crisis Core because it seemed that before the actual game, Sephiroth clones had been created, although not at the beginning of Crisis Core, so I assume it happens sometime in between.


Take These Memories  
By: GeneSeph  
Summary: Yazoo finds out the hidden truth behind SOLDIER and his brother's demise, which causes him to become a test-subject from Professor Hojo.  
Genre: Tragedy/Romance/Angst  
Pairing: YazooxOC  
Setting: Before Advent Children (well, really before any of the FFVII compilation)  
Rating: T  
Status: Finished  
Type: Oneshot  
Disclaimer: All related Final Fantasy names and characters are copyrighted © by the almighty Square Enix. And song lyrics copyright to Papa Roach- "Foreverer." This story is all me, however. Enjoy.

--------------------------

The bruises covering his arms were obviously not self-inflicted. Or maybe they were, but it was unlikely. He impaled the soil once more with the shovel, sweat dripping down his face. His breath was coming in harsh pants, but he couldn't stop yet. There would be no honor in the deed if he stopped to take a break.

Finally, he was finished. The hole was a good seven-and-three-quarters feet deep, and a little over six feet long. He jumped down, landing in a crouch and falling forward to his knees. He stood on his tip-toes, feeling around up top. His fingers closed around the arm he was looking for, and he pulled it over the edge. As it fell limply into his arms, he staggered shut at the pressure now on his sore and purples arms, more tears sliding down his cheeks. His silver locks stuck to his damp face, his mako-infused eyes glowing in the dreary darkness.

As much as the hole reeked from the sweat, tears, rain, and the corpse, he didn't ever want to leave. He didn't want to let go of the man now dead in his arms.

It was his fault he was dead, after all.

* * *

Yazoo shifted in his ShinRa infantry uniform uncomfortably. "I dunno, something just doesn't feel right about this. Mom's all on her own now, and she's not what she used to be with dad dead…"

His brother nodded. "I know, but that's why we're doing this. We have to be able to send money back to her. This is the quickest way, not only because it pays good, but also because Midgar uses mail-jets instead of chocobos. It'll get to Rocket Town three times as fast than if we were excavating in Bone Village!"

Yazoo gave a small nod. His brother had changed in the past couple of weeks. Venx had been immediately accepted into SOLDIER. He was third class right now. When the war in Wutai had been going on, he did volunteer work, risking his life to make sure some towns had efficient defense systems. Venx was only 16 at the time. Yazoo had been 14. You had to be 15 to help out.

Now, the war was over. Venx was 18 and Yazoo was 16. They hadn't been involved with volunteering the full 7 years of the war, but they knew ShinRa was the only place that they had hopes of finding a job. Their grandfather was from Wutai, causing discrimination against their family. The only pro listed on their resumes was Venx's volunteer work.

Yazoo suspected it was the SOLDIER surgery that had changed his brother. He didn't want to make false accusations, however, so he let the subject drop.

x-x-x

"Damn it…!" Venx walked into their quarters, slamming is sword through the floorboards and shutting the door.

"What's wrong?" Yazoo asked, standing up. He had just made it home, maybe five minutes before Venx, and was in his normal clothing.

Venx strode over, his fist spontaneously colliding with Yazoo's jaw. "Shut up!"

"Shi'it, Venx, what did I do?!" He fell back against the couch, massaging the side of his face.

"Don't even talk to me…" He dropped down beside his brother, running a hand through his short, black hair.

Yazoo thought he caught a glimpse of tears in Venx's eyes. "What happened…?"

"The mission… Hirate is dead."

Yazoo felt his heart sink. "He was my friend, too, you know…"

"YOU'RE the one who doesn't know, Yazoo!" He threw another punch at his brother, blood exploding from his mouth. "I WATCHED him die! His last breath was taken in MY arms!"

Yazoo growled in pain, holding a hand under his chin as the crimson syrup dripped down. As his brother collapsed into a sorry heap on the couch, he sighed, wiping away the blood and putting an arm around him. The younger boy rubbed Venx's shoulder comfortingly. "Calm down, Venx. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."

"That's f'ckin' right. You shouldn't've," he sniffled, shoving his brother off. "Just leave me be."

Yazoo rested his elbows on his knees, leaning forward and resting his head in his hands. He sucked on his busted lip, an awkward silence settling over them.

Finally, after moments of saying nothing, Venx let out a small breath, leaning on his younger brother. "'M sorry…" He mumbled.

"It's fine." Yazoo's brown eyes glanced over at Venx without moving his head. "I understand."

"Yazoo… I don't want anyone else to hurt you like I just did… You should join SOLDIER. Toughen up. Learn to defend yourself."

Yazoo shook his head. "I don't want to be in SOLDIER. I don't want to be a superhuman warrior. Something about SOLDIER just… bugs me."

"Are you saying I bug you?" Venx asked, slowly standing up.

"No! Not at all!"

x-x-x

Yazoo shut the door to his room, a hand over his blackened eye. The abuse had continued, gotten worse. And then after the abuse came the time to comfort his brother. _Something must be screwing with his head…_ he thought, laying back on his bed. _He never used to be like this…_

In a strange way, despite the abuse and the controversy, he loved his brother. In more than a brotherly way. He wanted Venx to be happy, he wanted all of this pain to end. Maybe it was just because of that that he felt this way. _I want him back… I want my brother back!_

The next morning, Yazoo waited for Venx to leave before heading to the ShinRa library. He made his way through the maze of bookshelves to a computer in the back of the room, sitting down. He powered on the computer, sighing as he saw it needed a SOLDIER passcode to access the data. He wasn't SOLDIER.

He vaguely remembered Venx mentioning how stupid the passcode was. He had told Yazoo, but Yazoo had a horrible memory. It was something simple, something anyone could think of, but wouldn't because it was just too easy. Yazoo tugged his chocolate hair for a moment, then smiled.

**SOLDIER PASSCODE:  
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*|**

He clicked return after entering the code, chuckling as his access was granted. The passcode was "passcode."

He pulled up the research database and entered in "SOLDIER." There were far too many topics, so he thought of what would help him narrow it down. "SOLDIER" à Subtopic à "Operation." That greatly reduced the number of articles. He read through the titles, clicking on the first one. It was a video of an old newscast, when the SOLDIER program had first started.

"_Today, the information on the SOLDIER program is to be released. Tune in later to find out all about it."_

Yazoo scowled, fast-forwarding through the next half-an-hour of nonsense. Finally, he reached the point he was looking for.

"_The objective of SOLDIER missionaries are far more advanced than the standard ShinRa Infantrymen and the ShinRa Security Departments. SOLDIER's will be used for more intricate missions. They will be our secret weapon in any future wars we may encounter, they will be used as assassins, they will be used to eliminate enemies of all forms, and most importantly, they will be used as maintenance for broken mako facilities. The process of becoming a SOLDIER can be painful, but we believe we've finally worked out the kinks. To be a SOLDIER, we first test your DNA for a mako tolerance. Some people have too low of a tolerance or a complete intolerance, and if we were to attempt to make them a SOLDIER, they would die. If your DNA passes the test, we bring you in for a mako-infusion. You may experience headaches for the first week or so, but that's the most extreme side-effect so far. After that, you go through extensive training to be the best SOLDIER you can be! Currently, SOLDIER is not accepting female participants…"_

Yazoo closed out of the video. Venx hadn't complained about any headaches, and he seemed fine besides his rapid change in personality. He definitely would have passed the tolerance exam. He shook his head. That wasn't enough information.

He slowly moved the mouse down to the next topic, a newspaper article entitled "Operation: Controversy" written by the great Sephiroth himself.

"_I may be a first-class SOLDIER, but that certainly does not mean everyone is cut out to be. I was an experiment. I was created especially to become a SOLDIER. Infused with Jenova cells at birth, my mako-tolerance is much higher than the average person's. I have heard that some people try to make themselves a SOLDIER without undergoing the operation. The company tells them that they fail the DNA test, and they think ShinRa is lying. They think that ShinRa believes they are not good enough. They attempt to perform a mako-infusion by themselves. Do you know what happens to those who do this? They either kill themselves, go insane, bleed to death from improper equipment or procedures, or they turn themselves into monsters. Have you ever noticed how many strange creatures appear when a mako-reactor malfunctions? But ShinRa never reveals the disappearances that happen at the same time. And yet there are still side-effects from self-infusions that we do not know about. That is all I have to say."_

Yazoo stared at the monitor in disbelief. "No way…"

"Excuse you!" a voice from behind him said.

He quickly closed out of the database as a hand came down on his shoulder. The mayor of Midgar and Scarlett stood behind him. He quickly got to his feet and pushed in the chair.

"Yes, Mr. Mayor?"

"You don't look like a SOLDIER to me. What are you doing on the computer?" Scarlett asked. "Not looking into ShinRa's Weapon Department, are you?"

Yazoo shook his head frantically. "No, Ms. Scarlett, not at all. You see, I'm a third-class SOLDIER, but my uniform was ruined and I'm stuck with this until I can get a new one." He shifted his weight from one leg to the other, letting his hair fall in front of his eyes. He didn't want them to notice he didn't have the mako-eyes.

"Hm…" Scarlett kept her comments to herself as she surveyed the boy.

"Well, he did know the passcode, so I suppose he is SOLDIER." The mayor was completely oblivious to anything that could have gone wrong. He apparently was too naïve to believe someone could have given him the passcode or let it slip.

"Fine. Don't let it happen again."

"I won't." Yazoo ducked his head, heading back to the elevator and making his way back home. He waited patiently for his brother, hoping no one had died on a mission today. It happened all too often.

x-x-x

The door opened and Yazoo woke up with a jolt, sitting upright on the couch. "You're late."

Venx coughed, rubbing his head. "Sorry. Mission took a bit longer than expected."

"What was it today?" Yazoo pushed his coffee hair out of his face, stretching his other hand.

"Confidential." Venx sat down beside his brother and leaned his head back, kicking up his feet.

Yazoo didn't say anything for a moment. Finally, he had to ask. "Venx… Remember when we first came here? You went to get a DNA test for mako-tolerance."

Venx nodded slowly, almost positive where this conversation was headed. "Yeah… Why?" he questioned slowly, faking puzzlement.

"After that, you… disappeared for a week or two. I was worried. Do you recall this?" Yazoo let his hands fall into his lap, looking up into his brother's blue eyes with a solemn expression.

The black-haired SOLDIER nodded. "Yeah. The infusion takes awhile."

Yazoo heaved a soft sigh, looking away. "Did you test positive? Did you qualify to be a SOLDIER?"

"Where are you going with this, Yazoo?" Venx's voice began to rise and his pale skin was becoming flushed.

"You did the infusion yourself, didn't you?"

Silence. It lasted for a good seven minutes. Then, Venx stood, throwing a punch at his brother's face.

**In the brightest hour of my darkest day  
****I realized what is wrong with me  
Can't get over you. can't get through to you  
It's been a helter-skelter romance from the start  
Take these memories that are Haunting me  
Of a paper man cut into shreds by his own pair of scissors  
He'll never forgive her...he'll never forgive her...**

x-x-x

Yazoo woke to the feel of someone's soft lips on his. Warm tears were dripping onto his face. "W-what?" He pushed the person away, sitting up. He could feel hot blood dripping down his skull and crusting in his hair and all down one cheek.

"Oh, thank god… I thought you were going to die…" Venx sat up, his face a mess. He was covered in Yazoo's blood and his own tears.

"N-no… I'll be fine." He ran a hand through his hair, grimacing when he felt the break in his skin where his hair parted.

"But… I won't."

"What?" Yazoo stared at his brother in utter confusion.

Venx frowned, his eyebrows pulling into a knot. "I… did the infusion on my own."

"And then they let you into SOLDIER?"

"I proved to them I was tolerant." He began to chew his lip. "Turns out I'm not. I was. It changed."

"But they continued to let you do missions?" Yazoo saw something in his brother's eyes that made him want to die. He wanted to comfort his brother, but after this betrayal, he refused to.

"No. I lied. I was with Professor Lucrecia trying to fix this. But promise me something."

"And what's that?" His expression was angry now.

"When I'm… gone… You need to become a SOLDIER. I don't care how. If you have to do the infusion yourself, do some research and do it properly. I need you to investigate what Professor Hojo is doing. Promise me."

"No! Not if it's what's killing you!"

"The mako-infusion… I did it wrong. I could have prevented it, could have fool-proofed my blood so it wouldn't change like this." Venx was becoming more pale as they spoke, and his silky hair was losing its sheen. "That's what's killing me. Do it right."

"I refuse." Yazoo swallowed hard. His brother was dying before his eyes.

"Lucrecia told me today would probably be my last. This is my dying wish. Volunteer to be an experiment for Hojo. He's doing something horrible, and maybe if he has a good candidate, he can stop this and perform it on you instead. Let him corrupt you. Become the exact opposite of what I wanted for us. It might help. If I couldn't survive being the person I am… I want you to be the worst you can."

His brother's final wish… "Alright."

x-x-x

blue… white…. blackness… confusion…. vertigo… extreme pain…  
whisperssoftlyinmyeardon'tletmedie…  
blood… surgingthrough my veins… mako…  
poison…  
childthirteenreunion…  
…REUNION…  
end


End file.
